Yesterday, a friend embarked on a transformative journey, the kind of journey very few undertake in life, especially in today's modern world of measuring life's accomplishments by the gold in one's pocket. The true gold in life are experiences, taking on challenges when one is called, and sacrificing material gains for the spiritual wealth that only comes through trials and tribulations along the way.
Adam embarked on a solo tour from Austin to North Carolina with his banjo strapped to his bicycle. Chronicles can be found here:
biketrek2011.blogspot.com
When he told me he was leaving on this wild adventure, I was flooded with emotion: excitement (wow, what fun!), envy (wish I could come along or do the same with my skates and fiddle), concern (such a long way to go solo), and spiritual elation (rare to know someone undertaking an epic journey of personal transformation, and thanks to the internets, being able to follow along and share encouragements).
I started thinking perhaps I am on similar journey, although not in the trek 10,000 miles across the South during a heat wave kinda way. In a way, I began my own journey back in June 2007, which led me to Austin. And arriving here and starting life over hasn't been the end of the trials and transformations. Even most recently, I feel that I've been in The Belly of The Beast, as it were, and not sure whether I'm in the process of being digested or indigested. Either way, I'll end up coming out a hole, covered in guck. That is, if I can find my way through the darkness.
The process of personal transformation, especially as an evolving musician, is profoundly spiritual. Throughout human history, humans have connected to the divine through music. Even in the Bible, we have all the Songs of David, the Song of Songs, and so on. Every major religion expresses prayer through music, the Jews sing their service, the Catholics (and most Christian sects) sing a lot of their services, and the Musilims sing the Call to Prayer.
Just taking up an instrument and making music come out of it requires a direct flow from the soul (divine) through the body (material). Each song we write is easentially an act of divine creation. As Shinichi Suzuki once said, "Beautiful tone, beautiful heart."
Which brings me to my personally transformative present moment, and my own journey inside my soul, to generate beautiful tone from my violin. As I mentioned in a previous post, I've tried to stop being so analytical about music, and learning to listen. when I play with my friends or jam along with my iPod, I'm less interested in recreating the song to it's every note, and concentrating more on making beautiful tones emerge and blend with the sounds around me. When I do so, I feel as if I am enveloped in a divine embrace, in a trance-like state, and my fears (of making a bad note) dissolve (at least until I hit a bad note, then I'm flooded with personal criticism). Overcoming my own personal criticisms is the hardest part of this journey. With the violin especially, being such a precise instrument where the slightest wiggle of the finger can bend a note the wrong way, I feel a need to hone and perfect, do it again until I get it right. It's called TRAINING. Without a mentor, I have to be both teacher and student, and the lesson book is written as I go along. Not the easiest route -- there are no maps for this road and the journey is long and solitary. Not unlike my friend's journey (except he has a map and amazing skills with his instrument).
So, as they say, today is the first day of the rest of your life. I pray I'm taking the right steps along the way, and not sure where I'll end up, but the journey is about the "getting there" not just the destination, which remains unknown.
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